KINGSTON – Queen’s University scholars have announced the discovery of a preliminary draft of Edgar Allen Poe’s famous “The Pit and the Pendulum” set in Canada’s famous quick-service pita chain.
“Poe’s literary work took him across the United States, so it’s only natural his travels would bring him to Canada as well,” said English professor Hillary Cross. “And now it appears he visited at some point in the 1830s and became enamoured by our fast food.”
While the broad strokes of the story remain identical, the first draft contains several key differences. While the unnamed narrator is still sentenced to death by the Spanish Inquisition, the setting is moved from a Toledo prison to the basement of the Dalton Avenue Pita Pit. The narrator is initially imprisoned in the walk-in cooler and survives by snacking on fresh lettuce, and when the deadly pendulum begins descending, it squirts him with Spicy Thai sauce to “lubricate the ol’ flesh-shredder.”
“This discovery has offered us unprecedented insight into Poe’s thought process,” Cross said. “For example, the story we all know opens ‘I was sick—sick unto death with that long agony,’ but in this draft the narrator says, ‘I was sick—sick at the thought of never again enjoying a delicious BBQ bacon cheeseburger pita.’ This suggests Poe saw a lack of access to pitas as a kind of living death.”
“The setting is also acknowledged elsewhere, like when Poe writes the pendulum ‘hissed as it swung through the air, like the hiss of banana chocolate swirl froyo being dispensed to a weary traveller.’ And then there’s the segment where he just runs down the entire ‘terrifyingly tasty’ smoothie menu.’”
Cross’ working assumption is that Poe removed all the Pita Pit references after being unable to clear the rights, but also acknowledged the possibility that her team had uncovered an early example of sponsored content.
“It’s a fascinating manuscript, right down to the hummus stains,” Cross said. “Regardless of the draft’s intentions, it’s a complicated meditation on fear, food, and the unbridled horror of visiting Kingston.”
Experts also uncovered an early draft of “The Cask of Amontillado” where Fortunato is tempted into the catacombs after being promised an ice cold two-four of Labatt.
