OTTAWA – After the beloved Canadian sitcom Schitt’s Creek walked away from yesterday’s Emmy Awards with 9 wins, the Canadian government was so buoyed by the show’s success that it decided to add …
Tag: Trudeau
Breaking: National Post pretends to care about environment
TORONTO – Postmedia’s flagship publication is making a stalwart effort at pretending to care about environmental issues such as scrutinizing Justin Trudeau’s promise to plant 2 billion tree…
Kielburgers start ethics committee testimony by asking if MPs want to donate to WE Charity
OTTAWA – In their opening statements before the committee investigating alleged conflicts of interest between them and Justin Trudeau in the awarding of the student grant program, Craig and…
Trudeau just one ethics commissioner investigation away from free ethics commissioner investigation
OTTAWA – Having earned his third ethics commissioner investigation in 5 years, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is now just one more investigation away from a freebie. “A lot of people say tho…
Media outlets that just committed to anti-racism stance take cheat day to praise white terrorist
OTTAWA — Despite widespread commitments last month to confront systemic racism within journalism, Canadian media outlets have allowed themselves a quick cheat day to praise the armed, white terro…
Inclusivity win! Hallmark introduces golf-free Father’s Day cards
In anticipation of this year’s Father’s Day, Hallmark has released a set of greeting cards that finally pays homage to all the fathers who do not play golf. Whereas before the only kind of Father…
Canada wins seat on UN Insecurity Council
NEW YORK – Claiming that they “will probably just fuck it up like we always do”, Canadian diplomats celebrated the country’s election to a seat on the United Nations Insecurity Council. “It…
Trudeau ends arrests for CERB fraud after discovering money is being hidden in foreign tax havens
OTTAWA – Justin Trudeau has ended his investigation into CERB fraud after his government discovered the money stolen is being hidden in foreign tax havens. The investigation began when the …
Canadian Dam Association releases report on the amount of work done by uncertified beavers
OTTAWA – A shocking centuries-long report has been released by the Canadian Dam Regulation on the amount of work done on the nation’s dams by uncertified beaver labourers. The report detail…
Canadian man furious that Liberals infringing on his second amendment rights
Grande Prairie, AB – In the wake of Justin Trudeau announcing that his government will ban most assault style weapons, local man Hank Cook is demanding to know why the government thinks it …