“Anyone who doesn’t talk about how big the crowds are in an erotic way goes in the Iron Maiden!” The Beaverton Weekly Report is back to cover all the top stories, from the tarif…
Tag: Pierre Poilievre
Poilievre airs new race car ad after being informed he isn’t polling high enough with men going through midlife crises
RANDOM RACE TRACK SOMEWHERE IN CANADA – Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre has launched a new campaign ad featuring him driving a shiny blue Chevrolet Corvette around a race track, after …
Poilievre refuses to believe carbon tax is dead until a body is produced
OTTAWA – Despite Prime Minister Mark Carney announcing that his government would be axing the carbon tax, opposition leader Pierre Poilievre refuses to believe that the dreaded bill is gone…
Poilievre to boost numbers with women by encouraging them to ask their husbands if they can vote for him
“If you ask nicely, maybe he’ll let you use the credit card this weekend too!” The Beaverton Weekly Report is making fun of the news once again. Luke and the Panel (Ian MacIntyr…
Want to buy Canadian? These politicians are up for sale!
In the wake of ongoing tariffs imposed by the Trump Administration, Canadians are looking for local alternatives to American products. For folks hoping to purchase the favour of a government offi…
Conservative man discovers secret trick to getting elected PM: running as Liberal
(Political) Scientists hate him for discovering a new way to be a Conservative PM in Canada! And he can show you how to do it too! It’s the second episode of the relaunched Beaverton Weekly…
Danielle Smith insists Trump helping Poilievre not foreign interference once we become 51st state
EDMONTON – Following a Breitbart podcast interview where Danielle Smith recalled requesting the Trump administration pause tariffs in order to help Pierre Poilievre’s campaign, the Al…
Experts warn Pierre Poilievre losing election he thought he was guaranteed to win will be very, very funny
“The human body can only shake with laughter for so long.” Welcome back to The Beaverton Weekly Report! Luke and the Panel (Ian MacIntyre, Nile Seguin and Clare Blackwood) talk Mark C…
Poilievre’s broken slogan generator to blame as he vows to “Dink the Rink” and “Slime the Grime”
Lethbridge, AB – Conservative party leader, Pierre Poilievre, spoke to a mystified crowd of supporters as he promised to go to Ottawa and “Dink the Rink” while standing in front of a banner…
Carney kills carbon tax, all Poilievre’s dreams
OTTAWA — After being sworn in as Canada’s new Prime Minister yesterday, Mark Carney’s first official act was to kill the carbon tax, and by doing so, killing all of Pierre Poilievre’s hopes and d…