OTTAWA – The results of the CPC leadership competition are in and, on the very first ballot, the country of Canada lost. “The results couldn’t be more clear,” said political analyst Martha …
Tag: Conservative Leadership
Former Conservative leadership candidate Tub of Margarine renounces Rebel Media
MELVILLE, SK – Former Conservative Party Leadership candidate and Tory MP-hopeful Tub of Margarine is distancing itself from Ezra Levant’s Rebel Media. The container filled with refined veg…
Canada to Kevin O’Leary: “I’m out”
OTTAWA – After a four month long pitch to Canada’s panel of esteemed Conservative voters, the business savvy nation stated that Kevin O’Leary’s purported valuation was “way off” and that th…
Why The Beaverton Corporation should absorb the CBC for nutrients
BY KEVIN DOWSE, BEAVERTON CORPORATION LACKEY It’s a battle as old as time: the CBC wages war on hard-working corporations, all while getting fat suckling at the teat of Mother Taxpayer. I used to…
Deepak Obhrai Conservative Party Ad
Deepak stands for experience, responsible spending, and leveraging this whole thing into a cushy job.…
Chris Alexander denies claim that he is Chucky doll
Our conservative party funded ads continue today with leadership candidate Chris Alexander.…
Maxime Bernier’s leadership campaign sponsored by the legitimate businessman’s association of legitimate business
Today we continue with the Leadership Ads the Conservative Party hired us to make by looking at Maxime Bernier. A man who wants to reduce burdensome government regulations, like all those …
Kevin O’Leary’s leadership bid derailed after condor attempts to hatch his head
OTTAWA – Kevin O’Leary has been forced to suspend his campaign for the Conservative party leadership after a California condor, mistaking O’Leary’s shiny, white pate for an egg, attempted t…
Kellie Leitch’s campaign manager resigns after scoring 6% on Canadian Values Test
OTTAWA – Nick Kouvalis, campaign manager for Kellie Leitch’s Conservative leadership bid, has resigned after receiving a failing grade on the candidate’s signature “Canadian Values Test”. “…
Michael Chong starting to think Tories aren’t very left-wing at all
OTTAWA – Tory leadership hopeful Michael Chong reiterated his reservations this week about the rhetoric espoused by his rivals for the party’s nomination, telling supporters that he’s starting to…