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MONTREAL – Just a few days before the election, a new poll in Quebec shows that Quebec Solidaire’s Françoise David is Quebeckers’ favourite candidate for premier they will not elec Ac…
Celebrity visit to disaster zone helps replenish dwindling supply of celebrities
MANILA – In an act of entertainment humanitarianism, a famous celebrity visited a disaster zone to restock a dangerously low supply of renowned entertainers. “These people have nothing to a…
Report: Kale is the secret to health, longevity, smugness
MONTREAL – According to a report from the Centre for Trendy Greens, consuming Kale twice a week makes you stronger, smarter, and more smug than your peers. “It’s really a miracle food, capa…
13 things you didn’t know were in the Conservative government’s omnibus bill
The federal Conservative government is set to pass a 359 page omnibus bill with a wide-range of new laws. Here are some highlights on what you might have missed: 1. 145 pages of “all work and no …
Toronto Raptors clinch playoffs for first time since last time they played in playoffs
TORONTO – For the first time in probably at least a few years based on everybody’s reaction the Toronto Raptors will be heading to the NBA playoffs this spring. “Everyone counted us out at …
An Independent Quebec would keep calling itself Canada, says Marois
QUEBEC – A sovereign Quebec would not necessarily change its name from Canada to Quebec, PQ leader Pauline Marois admitted at a campaign event on Tuesday night Marois, who previously assert…
The Economist surprises readers by using term ‘gambit’ in story title
LONDON – In a move that has stirred controversy among regular readers, a renowned news and international affairs publication has unearthed an unusual, yet clever term. The Economist magazin…
BC Conservation officer not good at conserving bullets
VICTORIA – A British Columbia Conservation Officer has been having trouble conserving the amount of bullets inside his Glock 22 sidearm. Conservation Officer Matthew Poole has received 32 c…
Lars von Trier offended by critics describing his work as ‘a movie’
LONDON – During a press junket on Monday director Lars von Trier expressed anger and annoyance in response to critics referring to his latest work with belittling words like “movie,” “film,…
Local family forced to euthanize talking snowman
BURLINGTON, ON – With spring coming on, Burlington’s Coates family has no choice but to put Mr. Snowglobe, the magical talking snowman they accidentally brought to life earlier this season,…