There are few jobs as challenging as being an emergency medical technician. Low pay, long hours, dangerous situations; it takes a certain dedication to help people like that. And for one man in p…
Archeologists unearth ancient iPod from 2005 in junk drawer
WINDSOR, ON – Calling it a “rare specimen”, archaeologists announced Friday that they have unearthed what appears to be an Apple iPod, dating it from the geological period of 2005 based on …
Child gets Facebook account to keep tabs on parents
SAINT JOHN, NB – Making sure they’re not getting into any serious trouble, local 13-year-old, Francis Hollander has recently created a Facebook account to keep track of her parent’s activit…
The Brick celebrates first day in 25 years without sales event
EDMONTON, AB – Breaking a decades long sales event streak, The Brick has made today the first day in over 25 years in which their stores aren’t trying to entice customers with some sort of …
Report: Average CEO also 270 times happier than average worker
OTTAWA – Measuring the effects of money on wellbeing, a report released Friday comparing employee life-quality to that of the world’s top executives says that the average CEO is now 270 tim…
Government experimenting with universal basic as fuck income program
OTTAWA – Rolling-out a series of pilot projects across the nation, the federal government announced Friday that it is examining the effects of handing out free yoga pants, Starbucks cards, …
Boss a little too enthusiastic about celebrating office Chinese New Year
LONDON, ON – Wearing a red and gold tie and bowing as his employees came into work, Gerald Turning, 57, a local sales manager at Brenk-Co Plastics was reportedly a tad over enthusiastic abo…
Call-out culture called-out for all-out call-out fall-out
SIOUX LOOKOUT, ON – In an effort to bring reasoned debate to social media, call-out culture is being called-out for being akin to an online brawl or bout, as people point-out thing that onl…
Puppy Bowl suspends black Lab for sitting during anthem
SILVER SPRING, MD – Causing a row in what was supposed to be a jubilant culmination of this year’s adorable puppies playing season, Animal Planet officials at the Puppy Bowl have suspended …
Ontario PC leadership candidate Doug Ford hoping everyone has forgotten 2010 through 2014
TORONTO – Announcing his intention to replace disgraced Ontario Progressive Conservative leader, Patrick Brown, Doug Ford is banking that everyone has forgotten events occurring between the…
