


MONTREAL – After barely managing to get onto the front page of the CBC website, a single piece of Canadian news has, against all odds, managed to find its way onto local man Jared Pulver’s Facebook feed.
“Wait, what’s this? Something about a flesh-eating disease escaping containment in Winnipeg?” said Pulver, as he scrolled past the barely-breathing Canadian story. “What does that have to do with Trump?”
The news, which just barely managed to wrest its brutalized half-corpse from the mass grave of Canadian current events, only survived for a few minutes on social media after breaking through the inauguration barricade put up by the New York Times, CNN, Breitbart, and the Washington Post. It surprised many by even accomplishing that.
“It’s pretty awful that an entire country’s media can be derailed by an event in another country,” said local journalist Karen Smith. “Do we really not have time to read about… um… I actually didn’t click on the article. But did you hear what the Senate Republicans did?”
“Crazy, right?”
This is the most Canada has cared about US politics since Trump’s last tweet.