OTTAWA- A report conducted by the Ministry of Environment says that the entire province of Saskatchewan detached itself from the rest of the country and left “probably several years ago,” and now is the first anyone is hearing about.
“Apparently they just packed up their things and left in the middle of the night, leaving a gaping 651,000 square kilometre hole in the Earth’s crust where Saskatchewan used to be,” says ministry spokesman Neil Levesque.
“They must have slipped out through the back when no one was watching.”
A recently discovered note, mailed to Ottawa and dated October 2015, says Saskatchewan was tired of being ignored. Satellite imagery confirms the province spent some time hanging around Amsterdam, before teaching English in Thailand for a while, and is now reportedly trying to get serious with Iceland.
This is not the first time Saskatchewan has left Canada. In 1912, the young province packed a comic book and a chocolate bar and made its way to the bus stop, but later came home after it got hungry.
Sources inside the federal government say that Prime Minister Justin Trudeau was relieved to learn of Saskatchewan’s departure, noting that he’s only able to store a maximum of nine provinces in his memory at any given time.
