NEW YORK – Republican presidential hopeful Donald Trump has found himself embroiled in another feud, this time with Republican presidential hopeful Donald Trump. “Who is he? Comes from a fa…
Tag: Donald Trump
Ted Cruz caught Google searching “How to move back to Canada” in wake of Super Tuesday results
HOUSTON, TEXAS — Following Donald Trump’s grab in yesterday’s Super Tuesday primaries, Texas Senator and Republican presidential contender Ted Cruz accidentally revealed his interest in imm…
Slow Canadian takeover of U.S. going according to plan
OTTAWA – In a dark, shadowy bunker deep beneath Parliament Hill, an assembled group of Canada’s top politicians, businesspeople, and spymasters known as the True North Society have expressed cryp…
Obama begins State of the Union address with 58-minute sigh
WASHINGTON – Speaking to congress about what shape the country is in and what his plans are for the coming year, President Obama spent the first fifty-eight minutes of last night’s address …
Donald Trump: “Some of my best friends are in databases”
NEW YORK — In a loud and unpleasant conversation with reporters, US presidential candidate Donald J. Trump defended statements made earlier in the week in which he said he was open to the i…
Carly Fiorina vows to end funding for Planned Parenthood baby BBQs
WASHINGTON – Currently polling at 2nd place in the Republican Primary race, Carly Fiorina vowed that if elected, she would personally end funding for Planned Parenthood’s “widely-known prac…
Local man deeply offended that you aren’t caught up on any of his favourite TV shows
TORONTO — What started as an innocent conversation with a coworker about last night’s Emmy Awards quickly spun out of control when, sources say, you provoked the scorn and derision of…
Trump announces running mate will be solid gold statue of Donald Trump
NEW YORK – Following the GOP debate this week, Donald Trump has announced that, if he is selected as the Republican candidate for President, his running mate will be a solid gold statue of …
Donald Trump creating divide in GOP between racists and secret racists
Boise, Idaho — The results of a new poll released Friday suggest that Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump is creating a divide in the GOP between its traditional base of overt ra…
Panicked nation realizes it exhausted supply of Donald Trump jokes in 2012
WASHINGTON – Comedy experts have been placed on red alert following the surprise candidacy announcement of Donald Trump, upon whom America depleted its entire stockpile of Trump-related jok…
