TORONTO – Ahead of the Blue Jays Home opener, team owner Rogers Inc. unveiled a new statue of Ted Rogers in the right field of the Rogers Centre. “Finally the people will have an in-game op…
Sports
Sidney Crosby now training for luge
NEW YORK – After Monday’s announcement that the NHL would not be sending players to Pyeongchang for the next Olympic games, Sidney Crosby immediately began training for Canada’s national lu…
Famine demands Colin Kaepernick “stick to sports”
MOGADISHU, SOMALIA- In response to news that NFL quarterback Colin Kaepernick has been instrumental in securing a 60-ton cargo jet and over $1 million in aid to fight the ongoing famine in Somali…
FIFA reminds Trump to leave corruption, racism to the professionals
LONDON – In light of Donald Trump’s travel ban, FIFA president Gianni Infantino has said that the US could be prevented from hosting a future World Cup should the president continue to encr…
Kyle Lowry wakes from surgery to find Drake asleep in hospital room chair
TORONTO – Recovering from surgery to clean out loose bodies from his right wrist, Raptors point guard Kyle Lowry woke up to find hip hop superstar Drake asleep in the hospital room chair, w…
Canucks fire team doctor Jenny McCarthy after 5 players contract mumps
VANCOUVER – Vancouver Canucks have terminated their agreement with their team doctor, Jenny McCarthy, after 5 players contracted the mumps. The actress, model, and alternative medicine advi…
Michel Therrien to take over struggling Timbits Hockey team
MONTREAL – Former Habs coach Michel Therrien has been quickly picked up by a struggling Gatineau Timbits Hockey team who started off the season with promise, but dropped their past five gam…
Patriots Super Bowl victory party gets out of hand
Things went a little too far……
Blue Jays, Bautista to remain in loveless contract “for the kids”
TORONTO – The Toronto Blue Jays announced this week that the club and slugger Jose Bautista have decided to continue their loveless partnership for at least one more year, citing a shared concern…
Winnipeg Jets-San Jose Sharks rivalry heats up over a girl named Maria
SAN JOSE- The San Jose Sharks-Winnipeg Jets rivalry has hit a fever pitch after the Jets’ Mark Scheifele accidentally fell in love with Maria Burns – the enchanting sister of Sharks’ Brent Burns.…
