TORONTO – An unexplained flash flood occurring moments after Ryan Gosling exited a limousine wearing sensitive, yet masculine formalwear brought the Toronto International Film Festival to a standstill earlier this afternoon.
“All of a sudden there were all these high pitched screams and what sounded like uncontrollable breathing,” said one witness. “I guess they were screaming to warn Gosling of the flooding because that’s when the water came.”
“I was just about to ask Ryan for an autograph when the suddenly murderous tides knocked me off my feet,” said local cinephile Richard Ward. “It was just like the scene in Titanic when the water breaks through the ship’s hull – only in real life the water was a little bit more sticky.”
City officials have scoured the area but are still unable to find the source of the water.
“All watermains are fully operational and sewage systems are unobstructed. There was no rain today. So far no one has been able to explain where the water came from and why it’s so warm,” said John Lachello of Toronto Water.
However, before organizers had even formulated a plan to deal with the flood, the water seemed to miraculously dry up right after veteran TIFF attendee Nicolas Cage began posing for pictures outside Roy Thompson Hall.
