Every grocery store, Canada – The guy who spent 45 minutes inside the store already without a mask has now alerted one of the employees he left it in his car despite not owning a mask or a car at any point.
“Oh jeez, we need masks now in stores don’t we,” said the man who believes everyone around him is as stupid as he is. “I swear I just left it in the car I definitely own. I will definitely, probably wear the mask the next time I come in here.”
“What kind of car do I have? A… brown one,” he added.
He then promised to call his supermodel wife who is sitting in his beautiful mansion so she could bring down his mask that he owns. But sadly when he called she didn’t answer the phone.
Loblaws security then offered the dunce a mask to which he responded, “Oh good good good, yeah I just am not sure if that’ll fit me I have a really big head. I put these on all the time but where do the straps go again? Oh around your ears, yeah of course I know that haha, wear em’ all the time ya see.”
After placing the mask around his neck, security then reminded the man that the mask was meant to be placed around the mouth to which the man responded, “Ah yes, silly me, these are the Canadian version, mine is a Japanese brand that goes around the neck only but sure on the mouth it is!”
Witnesses from the parking lot say the numbskull then threw a can of spaghetti-os into a shopping cart and attempted to push it out of the lot. After the magnetic locks kicked in however, he abandoned the cart completely.