LETHBRIDGE, AB – After moving into their dream house in Lethbridge, Alberta the family of Tom and Christie Miller have reported hearing “weird” noises and seeing glimpses of a wispy, transparent figure who appears to be trapped in the mortal realm until he successfully renovates the lower level of their 3-bedroom Colonial house.
The Millers’ suspicions of paranormal disturbance started a few days after they moved in. Their son Tommy had gone downstairs to unpack the Halloween decorations when he heard a spooky, disembodied whisper of “goddamnit when was this thing wired, the fucking ‘20’s?” in front of the house’s fusebox.
Although his parents initially dismissed the concern, they changed their minds when Christie saw a caulking gun floating in midair just above the downstairs sink.
“Initially, we assumed he was there to exact vengeance. But then he left us this weird note scrawled in the stairwell saying he wants to improve the basement with a view to renting in next summer. He asked us to initial it. Not really sure what’s going on here.”
The ghost’s presence started to concern the Millers when he began making requests for help with his earthly affairs. “I opened the shower and I just saw “get out” scrawled in the mirror,” said Tom. “But then I saw ‘of the house for a few weeks if you could just so I can re-do the floors? There’s going to be a lot of dust, so…if you could maybe hit up a hotel that would be awesome. Thanks!’”
Although the Millers first adopted the tactic of allowing the ghost to complete its quest in peace, the situation escalated when their taps began to dispense red liquid.
“Honestly at this point I was hoping it was blood. Blood I could deal with. But it turned out to be rusty water, which probably means he’s damaged a pipe. We’ve tried to be accommodating, but we have our limits.”
In an attempt to gently confront the ghost, the family gathered in the living room, lit 13 candles, and had a discussion with ghost about its attempts to renovate the house without using the necessary expertise. “But then to help, he just brought in his friend ghost, who didn’t know anything more than he did. Plus he was really impolite and frankly smelled a lot like weed,” said Christie, sadly.
At press time, the Millers reported receiving another message from the ghost informing them that he hopes to get a head start on remodeling the first floor bathroom in April.
