“I was very disappointed in the Prime Minister,” claimed local child Joshua Miller. “How can Mr. Harper make a real difference for Canada if he won’t even tell me why this night is different from all other nights?”
Harper also refused to comment on bitter herbs, dipping vegetables, or reclining at the dinner table, though he did mutter something indecipherable about the Wheat Board when confronted on the issue of unleavened bread.
When pressed to answer further questions by wise, bad, and simple children, Harper remained tight-lipped. He was later, however, seen offering a senate appointment to the child who was not yet old enough to ask a question.
Harper was also reported to be awkwardly silent during sections of the ceremony that concerned middle-eastern refugees seeking a better life. He later argued that, “Maybe the Israelites would have been able to stay in Egypt if the Government of Canada at the time had engaged in a military mission.”
“Yet another example of weak Liberal leadership.”
At press time, Harper was using the Afikomen prize money to try and balance the budget.