TORONTO – After 3 years of hearing Hall & Oates hit ‘You Make My Dreams’ blast through Scotiabank Arena every time the Leafs score a goal, die-hard fan Matthew Minden has be…
Tag: Featured Post
Doug Ford starting to feel like he should maybe look into this whole Omicron thing
TORONTO – Premier Doug Ford is said to be considering taking “a big look” at the Omicron variant that is currently causing Ontario’s COVID case numbers to explode. “…
Kellogg’s replaces on-strike Tony the Tiger with child-friendly scab, Jerry the Jaguar
BATTLE CREEK, MI – Kellogg’s is moving to replace the 1,400 striking workers at several major US plants after contract negotiations broke down earlier this week. Hoping to stamp out any fur…
Secular province fires Muslim teacher right before Christmas break
Chelsea, QC – In accordance with Québec’s Bill 21 law enforcing the secular nature of the province, an elementary school teacher who wears a hijab has been removed from her classroom right …
Ford: when I blamed young people for spreading COVID, I specifically meant my daughter Krista
TORONTO – Walking back his comments from several months ago that young Ontarians are responsible for rising COVID case counts, Premier Doug Ford clarified that it’s not all young peop…
Military official charged with sexual assault – no not the same one as yesterday, a new one
OTTAWA – The Canadian Armed Forces’ former head of human resources, Vice-Admiral Hayden Edmundson, has been charged with sexual assault this week in news you’re sure you heard already even …
Diplomats who spent 4 years training for Beijing Olympics furious over boycott
OTTAWA – After Prime Minister Justin Trudeau announced a diplomatic boycott for the upcoming Beijing Olympics, Canada’s diplomats are expressing outrage that they spent so long traini…
VPD: If you don’t want to interact with our unvaccinated officers, you can simply flee from all police
VANCOUVER – The Vancouver Police Department is assuring Vancouverites worried about interacting with unvaccinated cops that they always have the option of running away from the police inste…
Theatre-of-the-mind to be demolished for condominium-of-the-mind
THE HUMAN PSYCHE – Despite numerous fundraisers and letter-writing campaigns held to try and save it, the longstanding theatre-of-the-mind, popularly known as the imagination, is set to close nex…
Woman who stopped using self-deprecating humor not really funny anymore
VANCOUVER- Authorities and loved ones of local woman Ashley Calpeski became concerned last week when she stopped saying self-deprecating things about herself and started being no fun. “Ashley is…
