We sat down with Ontario Premier Doug Ford to discuss the Greenbelt scandal and how he plans to fix his damaged reputation. Premier Ford thank you for agreeing to this interview. “Yeah let&…
Tag: Featured Post
Country with massive housing shortage not sure what to do with all these empty office buildings
OTTAWA – As employees continue to express their desire to work from home, owners of downtown office buildings aren’t sure what they will do with all this unused space. Also in unrelat…
Justin Trudeau and 10 other Marxists you should know
Pierre Poilievre has labelled Justin Trudeau (and his father) “Marxists”, a term used to describe people that adhere to the economic and political philosophies of Karl Marx, namely th…
Conservative education ministers tackle urgent problem of children feeling too safe at school
REGINA – Several conservative provincial governments have enacted or are planning to enact policies that require parental consent for children to change their names and pronouns in school a…
World’s climate scientists recommend having only as many children as you plan to eat
GENEVA — The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change put out a statement today advising potential parents to only create and rear as many children as they believe they’ll feasibly be able to co…
Frustrated facial recognition program has foot fetish
CUPERTINO, CA – Computer scientists were stunned this week when they discovered that the Apple facial recognition program running on your iPhone lives a life of unrequited desire because it…
Report: There’s no College of Satire Writers, so we’re allowed to call Jordan Peterson a hateful little bitch without consequence
TORONTO – The Ontario Divisional Court has upheld the College of Psychologists’ determination that, due to his hateful tweets and comments, training on social media etiquette will be requir…
“The Leafs re-signing their best player is bad for them actually,” says brilliant hockey sage
TORONTO – The Leafs and franchise centre Auston Matthews have agreed to a 4 year, 53 million dollar contract extension in a move that numerous experts on twitter and reddit believe has doom…
10 ways Conservatives are trying to “soften Poilievre’s sharp edges”
Despite riding high in the polls Conservatives are worried that Canadians haven’t exactly warmed up to Pierre Poilievre just yet. So they’re spending a ton of time and money to try to…
Scientists baffled as Kleenex emerges from washing machine intact
WINDSOR – The scientific community is reeling after a Kleenex has allegedly emerged from a heavy-duty wash cycle soft, usable, and not in a gross little clump. According to local resident Michell…
