ONTARIO – With daily new cases of Covid-19 now consistently falling below 1200, Ontario citizens are celebrating despite the fact that these numbers would have had them peeing their pants b…
Tag: Doug Ford
4 COVID-Safe activities to do this summer if Doug Ford’s buddies say it’s OK
After 14 months of COVID we’re all anxious to get back to fun summer activities. Unfortunately it doesn’t seem like we’ll be fully vaccinated until September/October, but there …
Stephen Harper pretty sure he was sent long-form census on purpose
CALGARY – As Canadians complete their 2021 Census, former PM Stephen Harper is pretty sure it isn’t an accident that he is one of the 25% of people asked to complete the long-form ver…
IT’S SIMPLE! How to book your vaccine using 8 websites, 5 booking IDs, a decoder ring, and the divine providence of Christ
IT’S SIMPLE! How to book your vaccine using 8 websites, 5 booking IDs, a decoder ring, and the divine providence of Christ Vaccine appointments are opening up for Ontarians 18+! We know you might…
Ontarians a bit shocked Ford waited 14 months to pull out the ‘blame immigrants’ playbook
TORONTO – In the wake of numerous attack ads and tweets from Ford and his team that falsely claim the third wave in Ontario was caused by the federal government’s failure to close the…
Doug Ford to re-open all of Ontario as long as everyone super pinky-swears to stop spreading COVID-19
QUEEN’S PARK – Ontario Premier Doug Ford has relented to public pressure and permitted the re-opening of most major municipal centres so long as the population commits to a pinky-swear en m…
Ford recommends lying in order to get vaccine faster
TORONTO – During a recent press conference Premier Doug Ford recommended lying about your personal information in order to get the COVID vaccine faster. “After speaking with my experts, we …
Scathing auditor’s report on long-term care placed in a home, forgotten about until it dies
TORONTO – The Ontario government has responded to the Auditor General of Ontario’s Special Report on Pandemic Readiness and Response in Long-Term Care by surrendering it to a long-term home…
Progress! Ontarians granted 3 days sick leave to share amongst themselves
Ontarians rejoice! After over a year of tireless advocacy from workers and healthcare advocates, the Ontario government has finally taken a major step in halting the spread of COVID 19 by proposi…
Doug Ford wins best actor Oscar for performance pretending to care about people dying of COVID
TORONTO – In an upset win, Ontario Premier Doug Ford took home the Academy Award for Best Leading Actor due to his performance crying crocodile tears for all the people dying of COVID as a …
