CHICAGO, IL – In response to the new nuclear posture of the United States, along with the lack of evidence based decision making mechanisms in place, the members of the Bulletin of the Atom…
Meet Terry, Parliament’s newest ethics watchpug
Terry, 4, is the newly appointed ethics watchpug, who will serve Parliament by considering conflicts of interest and making sure members behave like good boys.…
Years later man still haunted by memory of saying “Hi” to total stranger he thought was Jeff
RICHMOND, B.C. – After seven years, local man Gary Alonzo still wakes up in a cold sweat, traumatized by the memory of that time he accidentally greeted someone he thought was his friend Je…
IN PHOTOS: Local children sleep over at Jimmy’s to read his copy of Fire and Fury
Group of children delight as they read Michel Wolff’s White House tell-all during a sleep-over at Jimmy’s house.…
QUIZ: Are you a very stable genius?
True genius is a delicate thing. Often brilliant minds are plagued with neuroses or mental illness. But sometimes, perhaps once every few generations, a truly stable genius emerges. One whose con…
REPORT: Winnipeg unable to take your cold weather complaints seriously
WINNIPEG – Reacting to a recent cold spat encompassing most of the country, the city of Winnipeg and the surrounding townships have been unable to take everyone else’s complaints about the …
Tesla’s new electric transport trucks able to travel up to 800 km on single charge while hauling 40,000 litres of oil
PALO ALTO, CA – As part of their continuing mission to create a green energy revolution, Tesla’s new line of electric transport trucks are said to be able to transport a full freight tank o…
Help! A tall, bald man appears in my house every time I mop the floor
You’re not going to believe this, and I’m scared to even admit it, but every time I mop my kitchen floor, a hairless man with an earring, dressed entirely in white. I first noticed three months a…
Canadian government greenlights gritty film adaptation of Don’t Put It In Your Mouth PSA
TORONTO – Hoping to capitalize on millennial nostalgia through a newly awarded government grant, Canadian mega-studio Concerned Children’s Advertisers has greenlit a feature length adaptati…
Trudeau gives Health Canada list of mandatory words including: “transgender,” “diversity,” “evidence-based”
OTTAWA – The Trudeau government has sent a memorandum to Health Canada insisting on a list of seven words that must be included in their upcoming budget, including: “entitlement,” “transgen…
