TORONTO – Following a Canadian Federal Court decision that Rebel News doesn’t qualify for journalism tax credits because it doesn’t produce enough original news content, the far-right outlet has filed instead with the Russian government for financial assistance.
“How dare the woke elitist gatekeepers at the Canada Revenue Agency deny Rebel’s application to be an official journalistic organization, just because less than one percent of our content was original news,” bellowed Rebel founder Ezra Levant on a recent livestream in between fundraising appeals.
“Fortunately, we tireless heroes at the Rebel received a much friendlier response from the far more enlightened Russian Government,” Levant added, outlining the newly-launched “Rubles For Rebel” funding initiative.
Levant reports that the Russian Ministry of Definitely Not Propaganda was “extremely interested” in the journalistic work being done by his site, despite their front page featuring almost exclusively reports re-written from other news sources, including several reports about the Rebel being ineligible for Canadian journalism tax credits.
Reached for comment, the Russian Ministry responsible for the Rebel’s new funding was eager to boost the Canadian outlet.
“Yes yes, we are very happy to pay for Canadian fear-monger to spread conspiracies and West-destabilizing vitriol,” reports Minister Sergei Smoliovitch, who recently assumed his post after the previous Minister threw himself out of a window onto several bullets.
“We are especially interested in The Rebel after another recent venture into North American media met with an unfortunate end,” added Smoliovitch menacingly. “Before we had even finished mailing polonium to Tim Pool, we saw angry Canadian man online, already screaming about same nonsense. Putin himself was like ‘Ehn, close enough’.”
Rebel Media has announced several upcoming investigative series, including “Democracy: Has It Ever Worked?”, “Trudeau Is Too Weak To Ride A Horse Bare-Chested”, and a six-part series about how all Canadian men aged 16-24 should defect to Russia and immediately join the military.
At press time, the Rebel’s dozens of viewers had not noticed any difference in the site’s programming.
