Local man enjoys mental health day by neglecting physical health - The Beaverton

Local man enjoys mental health day by neglecting physical health

PRINCE ALBERT, SK – Area man Cameron Elliot has reportedly taken the day away from to focus on his by indulging in his favourite restoration activity; slowly deteriorating the other aspects of his health.

“Yeah, I think it’s important to take care of yourself inside and out. Or at least on the inside,” Elliot told the press from the grime-covered couch where he would spend the next 17 hours minimum. “I’ve got my self-care package all set up. Malt liquor, a six-pack of store-bought cupcakes, and this old joint that I found underneath the cushions.”

“Everything I need for a full mental detox and a biological retox,” added Elliott.

Elliot has a full schedule of events for his mental health day, which he used to call ‘self-care days’, and before that ‘cheat days’ Starting from when he gets up at noon, he is expected to spend the early afternoon “yelling at the I play video games with”, having Tums after his all-red meat dinner for extra calcium, and finally watching TikTok until he falls asleep on the .

Having been at his company for two years, Elliot says he appreciates his employer’s many progressive policies. “They give us a lot of days, which I always seem to run out of for some reason,” notes Elliott. “I just wish they paid a living wage. That would help fix a lot of these mental health issues, because we know being physically healthy doesn’t help anything. ”

When questioned about the novel mental health regiment, Elliot’s therapist Dr. Victoria Greenwold surprisingly doesn’t condone any of his activities. “Yes, I know his itinerary is not very healthy, but that’s a problem for his physicist. I shouldn’t overstep. Plus, there is technically no known correlation between a Die Hard movie marathon and feeling bad about yourself, even though there’s probably room for study on that.”

At press time, Elliot was suffering from a migraine he was positive was from stress, and not because he hasn’t had a glass of water in three days.