WINNIPEG – Jacob Kubbs, 9 years old, reportedly spends his days sitting in the back of his Grade 4 class staring off into the distance, distracted by fantasies of being able to spend all hi…
Tag: Social Media
Report: Facebook pretty much just pet obituaries now
TORONTO – A new report released by the University of Toronto suggests that 90% of recent Facebook posts are messages of love for recently deceased domestic animals. The social media site, once va…
Connoisseur wants to know the hashtag for this art exhibit
TORONTO – After taking a selfie right outside the gallery entrance, a local art aficionado has asked Art Gallery of Ontario staff earlier today what the hashtag is for an exhibit, entitled …
Thirst trap liked by relatives
STEINBACH, MB – After posting a sexually alluring photo to his Instagram account in hopes of gaining the attention of his peers, 24 year old Peter Goertzen was disappointed to discover that…
Norm Kelly’s Twitter account revealed to be run by rapping cartoon dog
TORONTO – Ending years of speculation, he ghostwriter behind Toronto city councillor Norm Kelly’s wildly popular Twitter account, @Norm, was revealed earlier today to be local rapping carto…
Chronically late man still finds time to check Instagram
MISSISSAUGA, ON – Running a shocking 35 minutes behind on his morning routine Bill Benson, 29, had nevertheless found time to prioritize what’s important in his life: checking in on social …
Girlfriend’s relative thinks they can add you on Facebook just like that
HOME – In an act of what can only be described as massive presumption, Sheila de Souza, 53, a person that your girlfriend has confirmed is a member of her family, has sent you a friend requ…
9 proven ways to quit social media that you won’t even try you pathetic little addict
Social media can take over people’s lives and has been proven to have negative effects on mental health, self-esteem and sleep habits, so clearly it’s time to quit. You know this to be true in th…
Facebook’s ‘On This Day’ painful reminder that you used the word “wangster” in undergrad
LONDON, ON – Sources report that your Facebook “memories” have revealed that you used the word “wangster” in undergrad while commenting on a picture of your friend Todd who was holding a jo…
Liberals attribute Canada’s GDP growth to Justin Trudeau’s side hustle as a social media influencer
Watch this exclusive clip from The Beaverton.…