TORONTO – After declaring himself the Premier who says Yes, Doug Ford has revealed that he made the decision after re-watching the moderate Jim Carrey hit ‘Yes Man.’ “Folk…
Tag: Doug Ford
Ford exempts MPP from vaccine citing medical condition that causes her to lie about vaccination status
TORONTO – Ontario Premier Doug Ford is defending one of his MPPs for misrepresenting her vaccination status saying that she now has a medical condition that causes her to lie about her vacc…
Movement to replace O’Toole as leader stalls after Conservatives look at literally any of their other options
OTTAWA – Momentum for the ‘replace O’Toole’ movement that began on election night appears to have petered out after Conservative Party members took a quick glance at any o…
Doug Ford says he’s saving all the federal COVID money to buy Ontario a pizza party when pandemic ends
TORONTO – As the billions of relief dollars sent to Ontario by the federal government continue to sit unused, Doug Ford is promising all citizens that, when the time is right, he will spend…
“Why won’t someone do something about these terrible hospital protests,” says Doug Ford
TORONTO – As Anti-Vaxxers conduct aggressive, threatening protests outside hospitals across Ontario, many Ontarians are expressing outrage and wondering why government officials don’t…
Hibernation of unpopular conservative premiers signals federal election season
TORONTO – Writs dropping from Parliament has signalled the beginning of the hibernation period for odious, conservative provincial leaders who will nestle in their cabinet offices or homes.…
Ontarian prince promises a wealth of governance in exchange for small up-front fee
QUEEN’S PARK – Citizens of Ontario were surprised to find an unknown letter tucked amongst their usual mail promising them the untold riches of capable governance. The letter was sent by th…
Ford and Lecce present their back to school safety plan, “Pick the sick kids last during Phys-ed”
QUEENS PARK – After delaying for as long as possible, Doug Ford and Stephen Lecce have finally revealed their back to school safety plan, which is for kids to pick the sicker kids last duri…
Conservatives outraged by new requirement of “a passport” to travel
OTTAWA – Canadian conservatives are throwing heavy criticism at the federal government for mandating passports for international travel. “What a terrible inconvenience our government has in…
Maclean’s Curse strikes again
WINNIPEG – With Jason Kenney resigning, another victim has fallen to the might of the Maclean’s Resistance Cover curse. “I knew when Andrew and Brian went down that the rest of …