EDMONTON – After an image appeared of the Alberta premier not wearing a mask at an indoor meeting, Jason Kenney is defending himself saying it wasn’t a workplace since he has not done any w…
Tag: Coronavirus
Porch pirate disappointed stolen package only contains COVID vaccine
TORONTO – An opportunistic thief has been let down by his latest score after lifting the unattended UPS delivery from a hospital porch. “What the hell am I going to do with this?” said Tad …
Impoverished man doesn’t have to pay back CERB after claiming he was a profiteering corporation
OTTAWA – A self-employed man on the brink of bankruptcy no longer has to pay back his COVID relief benefits after explaining to the CRA that he already gave the $6,000 to corporate sharehol…
Ford moving York Region into lockdown now that everyone from Peel and Toronto have had time to do their shopping there
TORONTO – The provincial government today announced their intention to send York Region into the grey zone of Ontario’s COVID-19 framework now that both Toronto and Peel residents have had …
Ontario-born man lectures about Alberta Bashing
EDMONTON – Defending his response to Alberta’s deadly pandemic, Oakville, Ontario native Jason Kenney is labelling any criticism directed at him or his government as “Alberta Bashing.” The …
Canadians warned to shelter at home unless your job makes money for someone richer
OTTAWA – Health Canada is warning all Canadians to avoid COVID by staying at home, with the exception of those whose jobs create wealth for those with exponentially more money than them, in…
Snowbirds looking to be evacuated from more exotic location this time
TORONTO – Months after being rescued from a stranded cruise by the Canadian government, snowbirds Adriel and Harold Glatterbee are looking to be plucked from the deadly grip of the coronavi…
Brian Pallister eagerly awaits Amazon order for pandemic response plan
WINNIPEG — Amid peak covid cases, declining approval ratings and holiday cancellations, Premier Brian Pallister has ordered a pandemic response plan using Amazon Prime. Sources close to the premi…
Jason Kenney’s pride now leading cause of death in Alberta
EDMONTON – A new study from the Office of Statistics and Information indicates Premier Jason Kenney’s excessive pride is the new leading cause of death in Alberta. “Hubris is a pre-existin…
Federal government to get a second job to cover deficit
OTTAWA – The federal Liberal government announced it will be getting a second job to cover the $381 billion deficit projected in yesterday’s fall economic update. Vowing that no Canadian wi…