CANADA — Following reports that former UK Foreign Minister Boris Johnson has been building an alliance with Trump advisor Steve Bannon, his recent departure from Parliament, and numerous ot…
Oh no! The Trump baby balloon learned to speak and now it’s calling Theresa May the C-word!
The good news: The Trump baby balloon, a hilarious helium blimp making a mocking caricature of Donald Trump has delighted anti-Trump protesters in London and become an all-out international sensa…
5 great gifts for your grads that aren’t letting them move back in with you
Congratulations! Your son or daughter is almost ready to walk across that stage and become the university graduate ready to take on the world you always knew they would be. Here are 5 ideas for g…
Progress! Woman-friendly workplace installs crying room
VANCOUVER—As more and more women have fought their way into once male-dominated careers, some employers have been slow to adjust to the needs of female employees. But thanks to some creative and …
Mom cannot remember title of favourite song
Napanee, ON —Despite a concerted attempt to summon helpful memories, and numerous prompting questions from family and friends, local mom Diane Peters is unable to recall the title, artist or era …
Sisterhood fail: This woman suggested Sarah Huckabee Sanders is morally responsible for her actions
If the past few years have taught us anything, it’s that there is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women. Sadly, that is exactly what happened Saturday night when, at the Wh…
Westworld Season 2 Spoilers: The Park is just the Man in Black’s finished basement
As Season 2 of Westworld premiers, here are a few choice spoilers the Beaverton has obtained: 1) The Park is just the Man in Black’s Finished basement You’ll notice in Season 1, lots of questions…
Health Canada suggests limiting alcohol to 2 drinks per day unless you’ve already had 3 in which case fuck it
OTTAWA—Health Canada has released new guidelines emphasizing the importance of consuming no more than 2 alcoholic units per day, but only if you haven’t had more than that, because if you have, t…
Local woman flattered coworker chose her office to cry in
VANCOUVER—Local claims adjuster Laura Filberg is reportedly feeling a mix of gratitude and pride after, following what appeared to be a brief moment of deliberation, her colleague selected her of…
25-year-old coworker can’t believe you’re 30
MILTON – Sources have confirmed that despite your numerous assurances and even a brief viewing of your driver’s license, Lisa Eaton, your 25-year-old coworker, cannot believe you are 30. “A…
