by The National Post You heard it here first, Canadians: the death of wokeness lies in a gorgeous set of organic, locally-sourced bazongas. We at The National Post have compiled a full list of mi…
Following Appeal Court ruling, Ford vows to get revenge on teachers and nurses in a different, constitutional way
QUEEN’S PARK – After the Ontario Appeal Court ruled today that Bill 124, Doug Ford’s law imposing wage caps on public sector workers, was unconstitutional, Ford vowed that he would get reve…
Report: New girlfriend excited to use your relationship for TikTok content
MONTREAL – After extensively researching and logging the online activity and social media history of your new girlfriend Melanie, scientists at the University of McGill have concluded that …
“I can’t believe you have to work on a holiday!” exclaims woman actively patronising business
TORONTO — Cynthia Johnson was shocked and appalled by the fact that the staff of her favourite local coffee shop were being forced to work on Christmas morning, despite the fact that her being th…
Child abuse? This baby is wearing jeans
VANCOUVER – In a show of parental misconduct that would horrify even the most child-avoidant of people, a baby was spotted in a local cafe wearing jeans. The baby in question, Gerald Culver…
Housecat painfully aware of how much owner’s mental health is riding on his tummy being so fluffy
WINNIPEG – In a rare display of feline self-awareness, George, an 8-year-old housecat, expressed concern over the fact that his owner Elizabeth’s mental health and happiness seemed to revol…
Editorial: I protested at Trudeau’s Belleville visit and personally saw him eat six babies
by PierrePoilievreStan43 Listen up, you left-wing commies, my friends and I have been getting a lot of shit for exercising our God-given right to protest at Traitor Trudeau’s Belleville Lie-A-Tho…
“We’ll be so easy!” promises table about to ruin server’s entire life
TORONTO – In a stunning display of complete lack of self awareness, a group of friends sitting down to eat at Earls assured their server that they would be “Such an easy table!” despite the…
Pierre Poilievre vows to hold Trudeau accountable for Taylor Swift leaving Canada out of tour dates
OTTAWA – After Canadians were left devastated yesterday to learn that Taylor Swift’s massively anticipated Eras international tour wouldn’t be making any stops in Canada, Conservative leade…
John Tory proposes increasing Toronto Police budget to keep Torontonians safe from effective social programs
TORONTO — At a news conference today, Mayor John Tory proposed increasing the Toronto Police Service’s budget by 48.3 million dollars in order to ensure that the people of his city would be…