Kincardine, ON – Local man Allan Terry has expressed his belief that the Democrats need to improve their messaging and policy efforts if they want to win the next Presidential election, charmingly revealing that he thinks there will be another fair and free Presidential election in his lifetime.
“Clearly Democrats need to totally reshape their strategy if they expect to win any of the swing states Trump carried,” said Terry, apparently of the belief that these states will not be under Martial Law and requiring that anyone who wishes to register to vote produce a valid Republican Party Membership card to do so.
“Focusing on border security and cost of living will especially help with the Latino vote” he added, referring to the group of people Donald Trump has labelled ‘pre-deportees’.
Terry is just one of many people who have spent the days after the election speculating on what Democrats must do in order to succeed next time, as opposed to focusing on more prudent measures like stockpiling canned foods, building underground shelters that cannot be opened from the outside and securing passage on a ship bound for safer lands.
“He keeps speculating about who Democrats should run in the next election: Shapiro, Whitmer, Warnock or Pritzker,” said friend Mary Van Harmer. “And I just want to respond: ‘whichever one Trump hasn’t killed or shipped off to the new Gulag in rural Utah?’ But I don’t think he’s ready for that conversation yet.”
“At least the Constitution says Trump can’t run again, and the Supreme Court that will soon be majority Trump appointees and recently declared that Presidents can’t commit crimes has no choice but to enforce that!” said Terry.
