Washington D.C – Republicans have expressed outrage today at the news that a man whom they are positive is former President Barack Obama has entered the race for democratic nominee, vying for his third term as Commander-in-Chief.
Several prominent voices for the Republican Party have called the move ‘unconstitutional’ and demanded that the former President step down from the race immediately.
White House counselor Kellyanne Conway also commented on the bid, saying “this has nothing to do with race, this is about the fundamental principle that the same person cannot run for President more than twice. We’ve looked at his face for eight years, we know exactly who he is and what he stands for.”
Washington insiders say that Republicans are demanding a special counsel investigation into the matter. Some GOP supporters even suspect the Presidential hopeful of using a false name, voice, birth certificate, fingerprint, and blood type to deceive Americans.
Nine-term Republican congressman Steve King was similarly outraged. “First he’s the president, then he stars in Black Panther, then he moves into a nice house in my neighbourhood, and now he wants to be President again? This is how civil wars start.”
Democrats are split on Obama’s decision to run, with some saying they would vote for him for a third time, and the vast majority saying he’s an altogether different person with his own set of policy goals and initiatives.
With a tough race ahead, Obama may still lose to heavyweight challengers like ’Hillary Clinton With The Lesbian Haircut’, “That One That Kinda Looks Like Michelle Obama” and Bernie Sanders.
