Raising the minimum wage will kill jobs, so we shouldn’t do anything and maybe also cut taxes

By: Financial Columnist Mark Langshire

We all know that Kathleen Wynne’s minimum wage hike is going to kill jobs. Some studies and rough projections—and I don’t think I need to bog down this piece by going into any detail—show that upwards of 100,000 Ontarians could be out of work as a result.

Now I may just be a financial columnist who has absolutely zero suggestions for how to help fix Ontario’s veritable economic problems and shrinking middle class, but even I can see a disaster on the horizon.

I’m not saying that the government shouldn’t be presenting solutions or making suggestions, because otherwise people like me wouldn’t be able to make relentless criticisms while offering nothing to humanity. What I’m saying is that actually doing something, doing anything, to cause a change in this stifling economy would be a catastrophe.

Unless they wanted to cut taxes, that would actually be really great.

Do the Liberals think that passing on the cost of a $15 minimum wage to consumers is fair? Just look at what happened in Seattle. But don’t actually look it up, just take my condescension as all the evidence you need.

Any idiot can see that I’m right, and you’re not an idiot. Right? I trust that if you’re still reading this, you either agreed with me in the first place or you were undecided and my aggressive tone and grand sweeping claims have beat you into submission.

Also consider that if we raise our minimum wage here on Ontario, it’ll be higher than in other provinces. That’s obviously bad, for reasons.

I really can’t stress enough how awful this would be for the province, and the Liberals know it too. We’re talking about 100,000 people losing their jobs. Actually, let’s bump that up to 500,000. Why not save those jobs, and cut taxes while they’re at it?

I’m not just giving the same strawman arguments I’ve made in the past to protect the status quo and fill my weekly column, I’m giving slightly altered versions of those arguments to make a different strawman that stokes different fears.

Change is good, but it’s also bad. It’s very bad, nothing should change. Unless you cut my taxes, because that’s the good kind of change. Fight for your job, Ontario. Which is to say, fight for your three to four on average jobs, and fight for my one job.