OTTAWA – After revelations that both Justin Trudeau and Rona Ambrose had spent part of the Christmas holiday on property belonging to extremely wealthy supporters, Thomas Mulcair and the NDP are furious that Canada’s two largest political parties could behave so unethically while it’s third largest isn’t even invited.
“Obviously this is a huge conflict of interest and both the Liberals and the Conservatives should be ashamed,” said NDP leader Thomas Mulcair. “And what makes them so special anyway? We’re a federal party too. Don’t we deserve private helicopter rides or yacht trips through the French mediterranean?”
The NDP currently holds 44 seats in the House of Commons, a number that Mulcair admits is not great but that he believes entitles them to at least a weekend at a ultra-exclusive Swiss ski lodge owned by the Masonic Temple.
“I get that we don’t have a majority, heck we’re not even the official opposition,” explained Mulcair. “But seriously? We’re not even worth season tickets to the Canadiens? Is it because of all the labour union stuff in our platform?”
At press time, Mulcair had been spotted crying into a pillow after interim Bloc Québécois leader Rhéal Fortin was photographed eating leopard meat in the Weston family’s private train car.