Yukon votes 2016: Party platforms - The Beaverton

Yukon votes 2016: Party platforms

Yukoners will head to the polls on November 7th to elect 19 members of the Legislative Assembly. Here’s what the four political parties have to offer:



Indigenous Relations: Promises to consult First Nations the moment the bulldozers and fracking equipment arrive on their traditional territory.

Ethics: Reduce the number of criminal charges against Party MLAs by 50%.

Healthcare: Relocate the Whistle Bend Continuing Care facility to an even more unpopular location.

Environment: No, thank you.

Transparency: Opening up government tender to extended family and friends as well as immediate family.


Yukon NDP

Natural Resource Development: Ensure that every Yukoner has access to a ‘Protect the Peel’ bumper sticker.

Economy: $15 minimum wage or bust the economy trying.

Healthcare: Mandatory 1950s calisthenic classes for all Yukoners.

Mining: Add 100 new government jobs somehow related to mining.


Yukon Liberal Party

Indigenous Relations: Increase the indigenous synergy by 30% and optimizing results by 42%.

Economic development: Pave over to make way for an international airport.

Healthcare: Address seasonal affective disorder by adding one additional hour of sunlight during winter months.

Taxes: Lower taxes on businesses so owners can spend more on that holiday vacation to Hawaii.


Yukon Green Party

Environment: Does anyone want to run as a candidate for the Green Party?

Economy: No seriously, we need more candidates to run.

Transparency: Just fill out these nomination papers and get 25 signatures.