TORONTO – Local man, Andrew Tan, has spent a lot of time lately thinking how great it would be to be a rich person’s dog instead of a human male forced to make his life fulfilling. “I’ve be…
Tag: Wealth
COVID restrictions forces billionaires to play non-human version of chess
MONTENEGRO – With pandemic restrictions putting strict limits on the size of gatherings, many plutocrats around the world are finding they must now play chess with the original pieces, as o…
Canadians warned to shelter at home unless your job makes money for someone richer
OTTAWA – Health Canada is warning all Canadians to avoid COVID by staying at home, with the exception of those whose jobs create wealth for those with exponentially more money than them, in…
Dumbest man you know doing pretty well these days
OTTAWA — College friend Brandon Ward, a man you know to be dumb as bricks, is reportedly doing pretty well these days. According to sources which include Facebook, the Facebook app, and your frie…
Big city elite retires to their 300 sq foot basement apartment to eat beans
VANCOUVER – Local woman Kaitlin Escada, who based on her location and political views many describe as a ‘big city elite’, is spending her evening sitting in darkness eating beans after her…
Siblings irate after father buys golden child a better criminal defense attorney
VANCOUVER – Facing the possibility of life sentences, siblings Lee and Elton Konig were furious to find out today that golden child, James Jr., was getting a better criminal defense attorne…