OTTAWA – Cyclists across the country expressed their deepest apologies today after learning that they weren’t actually allowed to run every red light and stop sign they come across. &…
Tag: Featured Post
Spineless fence-sitter thinks killing children is bad no matter who does it
MONTREAL – Local man Morgan Powell has been accused of both “ignoring the plight of Palestinians” and “hating the only democracy in the Middle East” for his controve…
Manitoba PCs shocked their ‘imply everyone in the province is a secret bigot’ strategy didn’t work out
WINNIPEG – After losing to Wab Kinew and the NDP, Manitoba Progressive Conservative insiders have expressed shock that their last minute campaign encouraging voters to let their bigot flag …
Blue Jays admit the only reason they made playoffs was so bigger audience could experience frustration of watching them
MINNESOTA – After a 3-1 loss to the Twins to start their 2023 Playoff campaign, members of the Toronto Blue Jays have come forward and acknowledged that they only worked hard enough to make…
“Parents’ Rights” protestors describe what they think is being taught in schools
As Conservative parents continue to accuse public schools and teachers of “sexualizing kids”, “grooming kids”, “transing kids” and doing other verbs to kids, w…
5 tips for betting on NHL preseason games while your whiny children beg you for attention
Another NHL season is almost upon us, but if you can’t wait to see your team play – or if you’re desperate for money – the preseason can give you your fix. Some people say preseason hockey is bor…
Scott Moe: If Saskatchewan children wanted rights, they should’ve voted for someone else
REGINA – As part of his larger effort to teach all children (but especially trans children) that his government does not consider them human, Saskatchewan Premier Scott Moe has promised to …
Local pizzeria updates website from 1997 to website from 2005
CALGARY – Sources report that the Royal Pizzeria in Northwest Calgary has redesigned its website to only be 18 years behind modern design trends instead of a full 26 years out of date. “Wow, that…
Toxic Actions of Toxic Coach of Toxic Sport in Toxic League exposed by Toxic Host of Toxic Podcast on Toxic Website
COLUMBUS – Sports media was buzzing yesterday as Mike Babock, who has a reputation for doing incredibly toxic things in his role as a hockey coach, resigned following allegations of more pr…
Google Watch gives up on recommending exercise, maps route to Arby’s
ETOBICOKE – Tired of trying to motivate its owner, a frustrated Google Pixel Watch has given up on displaying its many health-related apps and is now solely showing routes to the nearest ArbyR…
