Trip to Cape Breton turns tragic after four overdose on Rankin Family
SYDNEY, NS — A trip to Nova Scotia’s most famous island ended in tragedy yesterday after four tourists from Ottawa overdosed on the iconic country-folk group, the Rankin Family. The inciden…
Embattled QC cabinet minister steps down, maintains he flew to Florida for anti-corruption golf tournament
QUEBEC CITY — In his resignation as Treasury Board president, Quebec Liberal MNA Sam Hamad replied to claims he went to Florida to escape an ethics probe, telling reporters “my honor is as …
Beardless Tom Mulcair challenges bearded Tom Mulcair for NDP leadership
EDMONTON – As the NDP prepares to meet for its annual party convention, a new challenger has emerged to current party leader bearded Tom Mulcair: a Tom Mulcair without a scraggly, rapidly g…
OJ believes OJ did it after binge-watching American Crime Story in jail
Lovelock Correctional Center- Correctional Officers say inmate O.J. Simpson has become convinced that the main character from the television series American Crime Story: The Trial of OJ Simpson …
Mississippi boundaries redrawn to officially relocate state to the wrong side of history
JACKSON, MISS. – Following the passage of a bill containing sweeping anti-LGBTQ legislation, Mississippi lawmakers have voted to relocate the state to the wrong side of history, just to mak…
Panama law firm pretty pleased they were able to hide the human-hunting stuff
PANAMA CITY – Representatives of Mossack Fonseca, the law firm at the center of the Panama Papers leak, have spent the days since the leak visibly relieved that none of the human-hunting st…
Woman getting off at Museum Station probably works at the museum
TORONTO – A mysterious woman set off a firestorm of speculation yesterday when she exited the subway train at an unconventional stop, Museum Station*. “I thought she must’ve missed her transfer o…
Whitehorse mascot awarded Key to the City
WHITEHORSE — The City of Whitehorse announced today that it will giving the prestigious Key to the City to the Liberty Tax Services mascot. According city council, the gigantic maple leaf a…
Date going pretty well, thinks man with laser sight trained on his center of mass
VANCOUVER – After twenty minutes of interesting and flirtatious conversation, local man Andrew Chen believes his date to be going pretty well, unaware of the fact that a red dot has been ho…
