TORONTO – Companies outraged that employees would choose to take the $2,000.00 Emergency Response Benefit over returning to work 40-50 hours per week in the midst of a pandemic briefly cons…
Canada bans Blue Jays due to COVID, sucking
TORONTO – The federal government has announced that the Toronto Blue Jays will not be able to play home games in Toronto this year due to the COVID pandemic, and the fact that the team was …
Liberals appoint WE Charity to investigate WE Charity conflict of interest scandal
OTTAWA – Acknowledging that an outside investigator is needed to look into allegations that the Liberals handed a billion dollar grant program to a Charity with extensive ties to Bill Morne…
Canada politely declines U.S. politicians’ request to kill thousands of our residents
OTTAWA – Despite wanting to maintain warm relations with the United States, Canadian officials today rejected the letter from Members of Congress asking that we reopen the border and kill t…
Execs beg Tim Hortons CEO not to release Black Lives Matter specialty donut
TORONTO – Executives at Canada’s most beloved/least edible fast food chain Tim Hortons have been begging company CEO Daniel Schwartz not to release the planned specialty donut “honouring” t…
Allow me to use my nationally syndicated column to tell you how my voice is being suppressed
By: Edgar Finkel You may have read the recent Harper’s letter in which prominent writers like Malcolm Gladwell and JK Rowling expressed a deep concern over the growing intolerance for opposing vi…
“COVID barely kills anyone,” says man who would probably be pretty annoyed if we killed him
TORONTO – A man protesting lockdown and mask measures has made the point that very few people will actually die of COVID-19 despite the fact that he would probably be at least a little piss…
Saskatchewan man keeps reminding people that CFL season was postponed too
REGINA – Amidst conversations about the NHL, NBA and MLB seasons possibly resuming soon, local man Gord Marsh is reminding people that the CFL season was also postponed as a result of COVID…
Trudeau just one ethics commissioner investigation away from free ethics commissioner investigation
OTTAWA – Having earned his third ethics commissioner investigation in 5 years, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is now just one more investigation away from a freebie. “A lot of people say tho…
NHL chooses Toronto as hub city due its fans having most experience watching other teams win
TORONTO – The NHL said today that choosing Toronto as one of its two playoff hub cities was a “no brainer” due to Leafs’ fans long experience watching other visiting teams celebrate playoff…
