If there is one thing that has sustained Canadians through the tough times of the last year, as well as the tough times of literally every year before that, it’s our ardent belief that we a…
Trudeau clarifies that Saudi Arabia isn’t an ally, just an acquaintance we sell a fuckton of weapons to
OTTAWA – In the wake of US Intelligence concluding that Saudi Arabian Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman was personally involved in the murder of Jamal Khashoggi, Prime Minister Trudeau clari…
Party that promised to institute Pharmacare votes against Bill to institute Pharmacare because it would too quickly institute Pharmacare
OTTAWA – The Liberal Party, which campaigned on instituting a national Pharmacare program, recently rejected attempts by the NDP to institute a national Pharmacare program, on the grounds t…
Erin O’Toole promises that Conservatives will always occupy the political centre of the far right
OTTAWA – With more Conservative MPs appearing to embrace right-wing conspiracy theories, Leader of the Opposition Erin O’Toole is assuring all Canadians that the Conservative Party of…
Man currently paying out of pocket for dentist, therapist and medication grateful to live in country with Universal Healthcare
Kingston, ON – Local man Brandon Struthers, who currently spends thousands of dollars a year on healthcare, feels so lucky to live in a country where the government provides for everyone…
Cheryl Gallant claims statement that ‘Liberals are a Satanic pedophile ring that bathes in the blood of children’ was taken out of context
OTTAWA – Conservative MP Cheryl Gallant said today that her recent claim about Liberals being part of a global pedophilia ring that uses their blood as soap was a “simple misunderstan…
Shovelling snow found to be number 1 cause of Canadians muttering ‘fuck this fucking shit’ over and over
OTTAWA – A new study indicates that the biggest cause of Canadians repeatedly exclaiming ‘fuck this fucking shit’ is shovelling snow. “Of all the frustrations that plague …
Man still in jail for weed congratulates Marco Muzzo on getting parole for killing 4
Toronto East Detention Centre – Inmate Miles Brown, who has been incarcerated for several years for selling marijuana before that was the government’s job, said he was happy for Marco Muzzo…
Ford: Thousands more COVID Cases worth it for chance to partially re-open economy for a couple months before shutting down again
TORONTO – One day after announcing plans to partially re-open the province despite the fact new cases remain over 1000 a day, Premier Doug Ford says the risk is worth it for the chance to h…
Leafs finally discover key to success: not being in same division as Boston
TORONTO – Having started the 2021 NHL season with a record of 6-2 the ever disappointing Toronto Maple Leafs believe they have finally found what works for them: no longer having to play th…
