Tokyo, Japan – Nintendo is celebrating after being granted a patent on the human emotion of joy, having fun, and general merriment. “Finally something we exclusively brought to the world is…
Israel reports they have found “missing” Greta Thunberg safe and invited her for fun, mandatory sleepover
TEL AVIV, ISRAEL – The government of Israel reports that it has intercepted a flotilla of boats, containing among others Greta Thunberg, which was in fact en route for a long-scheduled slee…
Jared Kushner surprised $55 Billion Electronic Arts buyout does not include $10 Billion DLC
Riyadh, Saudi Arabia – Silver Lake Partners, Saudi Arabia’s sovereign wealth fund, and Jared Kushner were shocked when they found out their $55 Billion buyout of EA did not include the new,…
Trump’s Hollywood tariffs force Dune 3 to shoot in Mississippi
Jackson, Arrakis – President Donald Trump’s proposed tariffs on movies filmed in other countries has forced Dune producers to relocate to Jackson, Mississippi. “It doesn’t quite match the d…
RFK Jr.’s new vaccine board includes Dr. Oz, Dr. Phil, Doctor Doom and Dr. Evil
Kennedy’s Volcano Lair, D.C. – Robert Kennedy Jr. has shocked the scientific community after firing the entire vaccine board and replacing them with Dr. Oz, Dr. Phil, Doctor Doom, and Dr. E…
Danielle Smith says Canada has some of the lowest living standards in the world thanks to her hard work
Calgary, Alberta – Alberta Premier Danielle Smith has made headlines after stating that Canada has some of the lowest living standards in the world thanks mostly to her time in office. “I e…
Point/Counterpoint: The Nintendo Switch 2 is Too Expensive vs. Big Monkey Smash Rocks
Point, The Nintendo Switch 2 is Too Expensive There is an alarming trend occurring in the video game industry where consumers will purchase anything despite the increasingly high price margins. T…
Trump places 200 percent tariffs on Donkey Kong Country
Donkey Kong Island, DK – Trump has announced that he will be placing a 200 percent tariff on all products imported from Donkey Kong Country. “We’ve been subsidizing Donkey Kong for too long…
Fake boomer on Facebook nearly fooled by fake photo of fake baby
News Feed, Facebook – Susan Miller, an avid AI-generated Facebook user added by Meta to socialize with people and mine their data, realized a baby photo she was looking at was actually just…
New hit reality show begs to answer the question, “Do you want to ruin your life!?”
CALIFORNIA – This season’s newest hit reality show is taking the genre in a new direction by making its contestants compete against each other to ruin their own lives the fastest! The show …
