TORONTO – A new restaurant in Toronto’s hip Entertainment District, Microwave Loven, seeks to replicate home made, traditional comfort food from people’s childhood by mainly serving microwa…
7 minion memes that make surprisingly salient points about Canada’s dairy supply management system
Just when you couldn’t love those lovable scamps, the Minions, anymore they start dropping knowledge on the system of quotas, tariffs and price control that make up Canada’s Supply Management sys…
After catching teen vaping, parent forces them to finish whole cartridge
BURLINGTON, ON — After 15-year-old Danius Jenkins was caught vaping, his parents Danielle Jenkins and Richard Mardow, made him finish the whole cartridge in the hopes that it would ruin vap…
Brexit supporters divided on the best way to fuck Northern Ireland
LONDON — After months of contentious debates and cabinet shake-ups, Brexit supporters have still not come to a consensus on the best way to really screw Northern Ireland. “I don’t know what…
Old Man McGillicutty found not guilty after evidence from talking dog ruled inadmissible
Coolsville – Jeremiah McGillicutty, known locally as Old Man McGillicutty, has been found not guilty of fraud, public nuisance and conspiracy after a judge ruled that testimony from a talki…
Study: 28% of Canadian bands found to be the Arkells
MONTREAL – A recent study conducted by the McGill University’s Cultural Studies School found that 28% of all Canadian musical acts were Juno-winning pop ensemble Arkells. “It was surprising…
Doug Ford won’t stop taping ‘Mayor Of Toronto’ sign on office door
TORONTO – Despite being removed every night by janitorial staff, Doug Ford continues to tape a handwritten sign on his office door that reads ‘Mayor of Toronto.’ “At first I thought it was …
Child dreams of one day creating content
WINNIPEG – Jacob Kubbs, 9 years old, reportedly spends his days sitting in the back of his Grade 4 class staring off into the distance, distracted by fantasies of being able to spend all hi…
Taco Bell introduces Cheesy Gordita Trough
Irvine, CA – Building on some of their most popular menu items and the basest instincts of their customers, Taco Bell unveiled their newest menu item, the Cheesy Gordita Trough. “We took th…
7 best Canadian craft whiskies to drown in ginger ale
Although 2 major producers dominate the production of Canadian Whisky (also known as Rye) there are many more smaller producers creating amazing, hand crafted spirits. Do yourself a favour and ch…