DALLAS – After almost a decade of service and thousands of flights Air Marshal Dereck Jakes is hoping this latest flight will be the one where he finally gets to become a hero by shooting a…
Elon Musk finally invents a way to fuck gravity
Los Angeles, CA – Tech billionaire Elon Musk announced today, after years of research and million of dollars, that he has finally found a way to put his penis inside the physical constant o…
Disgusting! These potatoes were grown in the ground
Everyone loves crispy fries or creamy mash potatoes but this story might have you thinking twice next time you crave some potatoes. And no I’m not talking carbs. Deb and Gord Russel operate a pot…
Budgeting genius: this man never travels or does anything fun
Sometimes it feels impossible to get ahead, the bills just keep piling up and money never gets saved! But one guy has figured out a surprising trick to balancing even the most perilous of budgets…
BC – Alberta standoff has rest of country dangerously close to paying attention to west coast politics
CANADA – With increased tension between British Columbia and Alberta over the Trans Mountain pipeline, including threats of an oil embargo, the rest of the country is scared that they are o…
Tom Mulcair sad no one noticed when he went to the Sikh separatist rallies
OTTAWA – Former NDP leader Tom Mulcair is reportedly upset that current leader Jagmeet Singh’s appearances alongside Sikh separatists are attracting more attention then his frequent and far…
Ontario PC’s unveil dental plan: a pair of pliers poor people can borrow
TORONTO – In response to the NDP’s campaign promise to institute universal dental care for Ontario residents if elected, the Progressive Conservatives announced their own dental plan: a sin…
Quiz: Are you at a Swiss Chalet or an actual Swiss chalet?
Literally every single one of us has been there before, disorientated, confused and unsure whether you are in one of the 200 plus locations of a middling rotisserie chicken chain, Swiss Chalet, o…
Bitcoin is a dangerous bubble, unlike the safe, secure bubble of Toronto real estate
BY: STEVEN SANDERS, Toronto homeowner The short sighted, short term investing that has led to bitcoin value rapidly rising is bad for the economy, and I know a bunch about money because my Toront…
Clint Eastwood’s latest film just 2 hours of an American flag blowing in the wind
LOS ANGELES – Critics are raving after an early screening of Clint Eastwood’s latest film “Flag”, 120 minutes of the stars and stripes bravely and proudly blowing in the wind. “It was a mas…
