PALO ALTO, CA – The inventors of Tilly Norwood, a computer generated character built using artificial intelligence, enthusiastically insist their creation is both unsettlingly lifeless and built on outright theft.
The AI-generated asset, dubbed “Tilly Norwood”, has been unveiled as a futuristic alternative to “meat bag actors”, a term for traditional film performers who require food and stubbornly wish to get paid. Tilly’s creators insist this is what makes their product so perfect.
“There are so many revolutionary things about Tilly,” explains Harlon Verkks, lead programmer for Xicoia, the AI division of Cyberdyne Systems. “Whether it’s the fact that she can never express an original thought or emotion, due to not having human consciousness. Or her utterly generically attractive appearance that is built upon the likenesses of thousands of real life uncompensated actors, it’s all very exciting.”
“One thing’s for sure,” Verkks adds, “All of Tilly’s performances will be bland, dull, and difficult to connect to on an emotional level!”
Verkks also cites one of Tilly’s best features as the “thousands of human actors who will soon be put out of work to create unwatchable AI slop.”
“Why watch humans emoting, which has been the basis of art since the dawn of time,” asks Verkks, “when you could scroll through endless disjointed videos that have never had a moment of human intentionality behind them?”
The programmers at Xicoia insist that Tilly’s youthful, yet sexualized, features represent the future in online content that should probably get someone placed on a watchlist.
“Unlike human actresses, Tilly will never be able to say no,” explains Lead Nubileness Rigger Patton Anders, “which presents exciting potential for a computer generated character we’ve deliberately engineered to appear questionably legal.”
“Thank god the rest of Silicon Valley is obliterating the notion of content moderation, otherwise we’d probably have some serious legal exposure here,” adds Anders.
Asked about the audience reaction to Tilly, Verkks grows even more enthused.
“The best part is that we genuinely don’t care if audiences want this or not. They might love Tilly, or more likely be viscerally repulsed by her in a way their brains can’t quite clock. Either way, they’re getting Tilly, and more soulless automatons like her.”
Verkks then returned to his newest project at Xicoia, aimed at forcing people to pay a monthly subscription fee for their pets.
