OTTAWA – Facing a massive financial shortfall and dwindling popular support after April’s election, the NDP proudly announced the launch of a new campaign on crowdfunding site Patreon.
“We’re extremely excited by all the new avenues to cloy for donations that this platform opens up for us,” said interim NDP leader Don Davies. “Like all Patreon campaigns before us, we are confident that the launch of this new Patreon will solve all our problems.”
The campaign features numerous perks for supporters, including discounts on merch like fair trade mousepads, gender neutral t-shirts, as well as early access to sensory friendly podcast episodes with top party brass over which niche issue the party is infighting over that month.
For $5 a month, Orange Tier supporters also receive exclusive behind the scenes content including fundraising emails the party never sent and ad-free question period reaction videos from former NDP MPs. Meanwhile, Mulcair Silverfox Tier Members are given access to the party’s Google Spreadsheet of people that might be willing to take over as leader, in addition to all Orange Tier benefits, for only $15 dollars a month.
For dippers looking to dip into their pockets a little more, $50 a month Layton Elite (TM) Tier Supporters also get exclusive access to an extremely unfun tone policing Discord channel, while Jagmeet’s Bros(TM) Tier supporters can enjoy a ride in outgoing leader Jagmeet Singh’s Maserati.
“I think this is a great way to raise money for the party at a time they need it most,” said one NDP supporter who signed up for Mulcair Silverfox Tier. “I’ve been an NDP supporter most of my life, but now I can finally get something out of it.”
“When I donate to the NDP usually all I get is a tax receipt and an overwhelming sense of disappointment, now every month I can have a fun little perk,” added another.
According to the party, the Patreon page is an early hit, with as many as 63 supporters signing up across the nation.
“In this day and age parties must think of themselves as purpose brands,” said new NDP head of marketing Richard LaFabre. “We’re replacing fundraising emails with tote bags. Grassroots politics with Roots merch collabs. By supporting the patreon, you’re supporting the brand, We’re still a party, but we’re a party like The Walrus is a magazine. We’re technically still that, but really, we’re more of a lifestyle.”
At press time, the NDPs patreon appears to be an early hit, massively outperforming the Blocs campaign on French-language fundraising site Indépallezallez.
