OTTAWA, ON ― The latest analysis of a local first-year North American History course discussion forum has revealed that every one of the 173 questions posted there was already answered in class.
Of these, a slight majority (63%) had been explicitly explained at least once, and in many cases, had then been asked and answered again in class before being posted once more to the forum. The remaining 37% had been indirectly answered during lectures, which a third of the class never attended and another third casually wandered into forty-five minutes late.
“I was hoping for some actual insight on the subject matter from a variety of perspectives,” explained Tori Wells, one of the few who visited the platform in good faith. “But within five minutes, I was completely disillusioned.”
After scrolling past dozens of questions about due dates clearly stated in the syllabus, requests for individual extensions inexplicably posted for the whole class to see, and shameless solicitations of classmates’ notes, she emailed the professor to inform him the platform was not working.
His reply explained that it was serving its purpose perfectly, since he used to field all this crap by himself via email. “Then he warned me that answering stupid questions will be the majority of my working life too, no matter how successful I become, and that the people asking them will consistently be favoured for promotion over me.”
“So I guess this forum did teach me something after all.”
