KINGSTON, ON – Friends of Kaitlin Barr, a 27-year-old neurodivergent copy editor, have recently said their goodbyes after Barr discovered a new hobby, and hyperfixation, of crocheting.
“This is wood-burning all over again,” said Bianca Brennan, Barr’s “best friend” who she hasn’t seen in 3 weeks now. “Because of her ADHD she goes down rabbit holes with certain hobbies that take over her whole life. She always opens a new Etsy shop and I want to support her but I don’t know how many more indiscernible watercolour paintings and uneven pots I can buy anymore.”
“She’s always been like this”, Barr’s mother, Evelyn, stated. “As a kid she got into making friendship bracelets and ran my bank account dry on beads. I was livid until I came to find out she was hustling them in the corner of the playground for double their worth to other kids. After that, I just asked for a cut.”
Barr has been known to jump from hobby to hobby with intense fascination. Sources claim some of her more memorable hobbies were bullet journaling, scrapbooking, up-cycling garbage furniture, rescuing baby squirrels, tap-dancing, tarot card reading, and even Scientology.
“It’s just something I like to do to decompress at the end of the day”, Barr said on hour 17 of a non-stop after-work decompression. “I just throw on some of the darkest murder shows I can find and practice my stitches – like this little breezy one I just learned called ‘Medusa’s Anus’ – and I feel like I’m in my happy place.”
Loved ones however, have expressed concern in Barr’s current crochet obsession. Apparently Barr gets into such a flow state that if one tries to remove the crochet hook from her hand, she’ll still continue the movement. Evelyn added, “One time she sat on our couch for 13 hours and made a sweater for a giant. But she’s otherwise… healthy? So I left her?”
At press time, Barr was already over crocheting and was seen online shopping for “lion-taming equipment”.
