THE INTERNET – Social media notifications have confirmed that a photo of yourself that you posted more than two years ago on a day when you felt cute has received a new like, prompting a detailed investigation into the identity of the liker in question.
“It was not the anniversary of this particular photo being posted, nor did the description include a trending hashtag,” explained social media analyst Natasha Mercanti, “meaning that there was no reason for this image to pop up in a feed and it had to have been found via creeping.” Sources report that a clearer photo of the account owner is required to determine if this level of creeping can be taken as flattering or unsettling, based on whether or not the individual in question is hot.
While this new like does suggest that the user responsible for it was engaged in a deep scroll, there is not yet any evidence pointing to whether this like was intended to send a message or was merely a horrifying accident.
Witnesses have described your attempts to determine if this account actually belongs to a brand or a bot as, “frustrated but determined, bordering on obsessive,” while your ability to avoid accidentally liking any of their content was referred to as “precise, with laser-like focus.”
Previous instances of unexpected atemporal likes on past selfies include the time your aunt added you on social media, the courting stages of your previous relationship, and six months after the breakup of that same relationship.
Although it is not yet clear how this individual discovered your profile, your friend who you thought might know them insists that, “they’re probably just looking to promote their SoundCloud.”
Sources have confirmed that if it’s the new guy at work who did this, things are going to be so weird.
