CALGARY – After a recording released this week revealed that, in 2000, UCP leader Jason Kenney took strong positions against gay marriage and gay adoption, Kenny is defending himself by pointing out that he has evolved into the kind of politician smart enough to not say what he really believes out loud.
“At the time, the positions I took were no different than those of the majority of Albertans,” said Kenney. “But now that they have changed their positions, I have changed as well. By no longer talking about the positions I still hold and have not changed in any way.”
“I will instead express my opinions using harangues at family gatherings, soliloquies in empty fields, and in dialogue with a friendly bartender in a vest and bowtie willing to lend an ear” he added.
If he is elected premier Kenney has promised not to re-open debate on divisive social issues, save for his promise to tell parents if their kid is part of a gay-straight alliance, privatize healthcare, and slash the social safety net. However, his defenders don’t seem to think this latest issue would affect his electability.
“As long as a politician doesn’t say what they think out loud anymore, there is no reason for anyone to hesitate about voting them to the highest office in the province,” said UCP executive director Janice Harrington. “Besides, he can use still use subtle dog whistles on Twitter.”
At press time pollsters had warned that if 10-12 more damaging recordings of Kenney come out, there might be a real chance that the UCP only wins a minority government.
