WASHINGTON, D.C. – Putting off plans that everyone assumes were drawn up as soon as election results were confirmed, the CIA has seemingly balked once again at overthrowing the dangerous and unstable regime currently occupying the United States executive branch for at least one more day.
“It’s hard to say why they haven’t acted yet,” said Jeremy Flagstaff, analyst at the capital region based think-tank KANO Security Consulting. “I mean, they HAVE to have thought of this already. It’s not like they haven’t been accused of doing this sort of thing before. But typically the CIA will move quickly once they believe removal of a head of state is in the national interests of the [U.S.] country. So I’m just as baffled as you are.”
Sources inside the US intelligence community have refused to confirm when or if such plans will take place, despite growing support for the idea from within the populace to eliminate the profoundly narcissistic, incompetent and unpredictable man armed with nuclear weapons sitting in the oval office.
Along with removing several democratically elected officials in various countries, the CIA has a track record of other morally dubious and illegal activities, including torture black sites, extrajudicial killings and, of course, exposing US citizens to hallucinogenic substances for the purposes of mind control during the MKUltra years, all leading many to ask the obvious question: “What’s taking so long?”
“What’s so hard about this one?” added human rights lawyer Fareed Al Hannour with Human Rights Watch International. “It would be good to know that the oppressive forces of a well funded security and intelligence apparatus can work in your favour sometimes.”
