In a long-awaited announcement from Lucasfilm yesterday morning, it was finally revealed that the upcoming Star Wars film will be titled “Star Wars: Episode 9 – Y’all Want Some More Dad Mysteries?”
“With The Force Awakens, fans responded so strongly to the reveal that Han Solo was Kylo Ren’s father, and of course they’ve been speculating like crazy as to who Rey’s father is,” said writer/director JJ Abrams. “We think audiences spoke loud and clear as to what they want to see in this next film: more dad mysteries, bigger and more complex ones, every damn way you look. Well, open wide.”
“Yo, dad mysteries, hot off the grill from outer space, who’s ready? You ready? Yeah, my boy over here is ready, look at him,” added Abrams, pointing around the room at the press junket.
Like the previous films before it, the latest Star Wars entry will embody a classic hero’s journey, the cornerstone of which is a good dad mystery. In addition to delving deeper into the mystery of Rey’s father, Abrams says the sequel will introduce several exciting new dad mysteries surrounding the fathers of Finn, General Hux, Lando, the late Yoda, the guy who goes “It’s A Trap”, and at least twelve stormtroopers. And of course, the film will introduce a wide array of fantastical new human and alien characters, each more unaware of who their dad is than the last.
Even the identity of Luke Skywalker’s father, the original dad mystery of the franchise – and arguably of the science fiction genre on the whole – will be called into question, through a series of flashbacks and visions that strongly imply that he could have been fathered by tiny robot BB-8.
“Obviously I don’t want to to spoil anything else, so I’ll just say this,” added Abrams. “If you watch this movie all the way to the end and you know for certain who any single character’s dad is, congratulations: you’re a liar, and we’ll see you in 2019.”
