NATIONWIDE – A recent report from the Associated Press has found that there is very little evidence that flossing works, leading millions of people to continue not doing it.
“As soon as I heard the news I didn’t floss for the last 15 years,” said 25 year-old Dennis Hadcliffe. “I can’t believe how much time I could have wasted. You know, assuming I ever flossed.”
Reports say that hundreds of thousands of other Canadians have also sprung into action, promptly letting dozens of totally unused floss dispensers pile up in their medicine cabinets.
“Wait flossing doesn’t do anything?” said local woman Kerry Philpot. “Next you’re going to tell me that I should take vitamins, which is definitely something I’ve remembered to do everyday in my adult life.”
At press time, dentists had been inundated with appointment requests made by smug patients.
