SALON-DE-PROVENCE, FRANCE – An international team of archaeologists has discovered a shocking Nostradamus prophecy that seems to have foretold the events of 7-11, nearly half a millennium before they occurred.
“This is a remarkable finding,” said Pierre Dassin, the team leader. “We don’t know why the verse didn’t make it into his book, but it certainly should have: its description of the place where I buy taquitos is simply uncanny.”
The prophecy, written in Nostradamus’s signature quatrain style, reads, “In the Year 1946, clothed in orange, red, green and white/From the south will come the great betrayer/To bring to shelves the frozen carbonated concoction/And reign before and after other places where you can buy candy a homeless man has touched.”
Experts believe that the first line alludes to the birth year of the company and the colours of its logo, the second to Dallas Texas, where 7-11 is headquartered, the third to the famous Slurpee beverage, and the fourth to what makes the chain so great.
The discovery seems to underscore Nostradamus’s successful predictions of both world wars, the rise of Napoleon and the Great Fire of London.
Some skeptics, however, suggest that the wording is too vague to be applied to 7-11, since it contains no mention of public restrooms that are somehow worse than the ones at Burger King.
