TORONTO – With the threat of a US corporate giant entering the Canadian telecommunications market, Telus, Rogers and Bell stated that only Canadian enterprises have the right to fleece Canadians.
“This American conglomerate will create a bloodbath of Canadian-owned phone companies” said Rogers Vice President Bill Lindh at a rare press conference with all three companies represented. “Verizon will use the same loopholes, scams and a slanted playing field to take advantage of Canadian consumers that we do. But here’s the kicker; they’re not Canadian.
“Hockey. Maple syrup. Paying high cell phone bills. These are Canadian traditions that we cherish.” Lindh added.
The three largest Canadian companies have began an extensive radio and television ad campaign against the potential take-over and created a political movement called Generous Canadians Supporting Canadian Telecommunications.
“It’s just not fair!” sobbing Bell Canada CEO Bert A. Cope exclaimed stomping his foot down to emphasize his frustration. “Long term contracts, limited data plans, hidden fees, roaming charges…these are our ideas that Verizon will steal from us!”
Verizon expressed an interest in purchasing Wind Mobile and Mobilicity last month, but has since backed off after the President and CEO of Telus Darrell Entwistle threatened to euthanize all the animals featured in Telus advertisements.
