WASHINGTON D.C. – After an estimated 113 million Americans tuned in to watch Super Bowl LIX, the nation arose Monday morning to discover that Canadian forces had used the opportunity to onc…
Tag: USA
Trudeau quietly sends “U up” DMs to rest of world’s economies
OTTAWA – Following a weekend where US President Donald Trump suddenly backed down from a threat to impose 25% tariffs on Canada, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has been observed sliding into…
Furious Poilievre criticizes Trump tariffs for uniting Canadians
OTTAWA – Following a tumultuous weekend in which Donald Trump threatened Canada with steep tariffs on all goods, only to back down, Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre angrily criticized t…
Single Canadian guy actually smuggling fentanyl to US really flattered by task force
WINDSOR, ON – Derryl Virkin, the sole Canadian who has been smuggling negligible amounts of fentanyl across the US border, has reported feeling “really flattered and kinda giddy but also ki…
Woman who agrees with Doug Ford halting US liquor also needs that liquor to deal with fact she agrees with Doug Ford
HAMILTON, ON — With Premier Doug Ford ordering Ontario LCBOs to stop selling US alcohol due to President Trump’s tariffs, accountant Marianne Thompson has expressed frustration that she won’…
US tariffs prompt Canadians to stock up on smuggled handguns
WINDSOR, ON – With president Donald Trump threatening to impose blanket 25% tariffs on all goods crossing into the United States, Canadian citizens are hurrying to stockpile illegal America…
Billionaire known for stealing people’s ideas debuts totally new, original salute
WASHINGTON D. C. – Attention seeking billionaire and human husk, Elon Musk, known for co-opting other people’s ideas and profiting from them, came out at President Trump’s inauguration to debut a…
Doug Ford gets second hat to clarify that he is still for sale
QUEEN’S PARK – Soon after debuting his “Canada Is Not For Sale” hat, Ontario Premier Doug Ford was spotted wearing a second hat to clarify that he is still very much for sale. “I was thrill…
Danielle Smith applies for refugee status in USA
COUTTS, AB – Alberta Premier Danielle Smith has arrived on foot at the Coutts-Sweet Grass border crossing station, petitioning for refugee status in the US on the grounds of being persecute…
Trump encouraging NATO members to increase military spending by making the US a viable target
MAR-A-LAGO, FL – U.S. President-Elect Donald Trump has unveiled a key component of his plan to make other member nations of NATO invest more in defense; turning America into a viable intern…
